Lazy Dungeon Master — Chapter 88

Aristocrat’s Rescue Party


Now then, that aristocrat from the other day is still trapped in there.
There’s been little development.

… Unfortunately, they haven’t gotten to the point of killing each other yet. It looks like they’re starting to thin out since their food’s ran out though.
There hasn’t been any developments in the dungeon, but there has been outside of it. A search party came.
There were ten people in it. I think that’s a moderate number. Rather, to comment on it, that’s a troubling amount.

The rescue group called themselves elite guardsmen knights and each were in uniforms. They seem to be composed of E-Rank to C-Rank adventurers to dive into the dungeon. Their DP feels great… that’s about the only good thing I can see about these guys though.
Really, these guys have horrible manners.




Like when they came to the inn, they surrounded the counter with all ten of them like they were trying to coerce us.
On the other hand, Ichika who was working at the reception desk handled them easily. It didn’t turn into much of a situation. She didn’t live a life that eventually lead to her becoming a slave just for show, she has guts. I might’ve wet myself if it were me.
(According to Ichika, it seems she’s seriously afraid of getting surrounded by debt collectors.)

“Yaho~. Welcome to [Dancing Doll’s Pavilion]~”
“We are the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order. We will rent this inn’s rooms, be thankful.”

With that, the simple search party’s commanding officer threw back his head with an arrogant air of superiority.
Ichika just let it slide and explained the fees.

“Heheh~, one person’s fifty copper, meals excluded. I guarantee their deliciousness though~”
“Haah? Fifty copper per person and meals are extra!? … I’ll have you know that we are the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order!”
“Mmm, so what?”
“Wha—… I said that we are the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order!”

I wonder, is [The Rich Family’s Third Elite Guardsmen Knight Order] something amazing? Maybe it’s something like a coupon that saves you money when you mention it?
Well, it’s not like it’ll work at all at this inn though. It’s management is someone from another world.
It’s probably better to get payment in advance, these guys seems like the type to say they’ll pay later and just run away.

“The Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order huh… Heh~, the adventurer guild branch office nearby will hear about ya later~”
“Gu—… whatever, the food from such a cheap inn like this would be unappetizing anyways! We don’t need food!”
“Yah yah, then that’s… one~ two~ three~… ten people huh?”

Ichika got them to behave themselves somehow by saying she’d tattle on them to the adventurer guild. Good job!
Even if it’s for a rescue, it’s really effective for adventurers that dive into dungeons.
The search party’s commander then put four silver and fifty copper on the counter. Seriously, he’s petty.

“It’s fifty per person y’know? Rich Family’s Third Elite Guardsmen Knight Order-sa~n?”
“Tch—, greedy Paveueran…”

He bitterly placed the last fifty copper coins on the counter… doesn’t this fall under travel expenses? This Rich family must be pretty stingy.

“Oi, woman. You’re coming to my room later to have a good time.”
“Ah, we don’t have that kind of service here. Help yourself if it’s between you guest knights~”
“… You know we are the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order?”

We get that you’re some kind of knight order already.
Well, it’s a good thing I got a hunch and had Ichika work at reception. The newbies wouldn’t have been able to deal with them.
Rather… the heck did Ichika-san mean by saying ‘between you guest knights’?

Giving up because Ichika easily dealt with whatever he said, he quietly accepted keys to five twin rooms, the Knight Order-donos (delinquents) walked to their rooms. First stage success.

Then after that, it became mealtime.
Even though he said that he wouldn’t need food, he came to the dining room at meal time.
Meat was the one to deal with him there.

“Oi, give us food. I paid.”

The hell you did!
Ah, unintentionally felt like standing up and tsukkomi’ing him. I’d just happened to come to the dining room to eat a meal.

I mean, we have a meal ticket system here. Since you need to hand over a meal ticket to receive your meal, if you don’t have a ticket you won’t be served.
It’s the same thing even if you lose your ticket somehow. Well, if you bought the meal ticket at the reception desk and explained it properly it would be worked out, but right now only an idiot would forget that guy’s remark.

“Do you have a meal ticket? If you don’t have one, please purchase it again at the reception desk.”
“F*cking kid! So cheeky even though you’re just a filthy beastkin!”

The self-proclaimed knight commander lunged at Meat who gave him the template answer exactly as the manual told her to.
Filthy? Meat is way cleaner than you guys. She has to smell good to be a hug pillow to sleep with after all.

“Come here, I’ll educate you!”
“I’ll decline.”

Meat easily avoided the self-proclaimed knight leader’s attempt to grasp her arm. He looked very uncool there.
As expected, he was very self-aware about that. He tried to catch her again, but was easily avoided yet again.
The other guests that had come to eat were whistling and cheering her magnificent evasion performance like it was a show.

“Guh—, defying me even though you’re just a beastkin!? Don’t you know what the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order is!?”
“I do not know.”

Yep, I didn’t tell Meat since I don’t know either. Maybe someone will explain to us just how great they are sooner or later?

“The Rich family could easily crush an inn like this!”
“Is that so?”

I’d told Meat to properly ignore whatever he said.
Rather, for argument’s sake, even if that Rich family can crush this inn… don’t you just work for them? This guy’s just saying whatever he wants to boast.

“But yeahhh… right, your body’s more or less good looking, that’ll work. Be happy, give your body to me and I won’t have this inn crushed.”

The heck are you saying to a little girl, oi. You have no integrity.

“I’ll decline.”
“… You don’t care what happens to this inn then?”

… He’s gradually turning into an eyesore. The other guests are also getting pretty irritated.
And so, I stood up in front of Meat as though to protect her and adressed the self-proclaimed knight commander.

“Oi, you. Cut it out.”
“Aaah!? The hell are you, don’t you know that we are—”
“This inn’s sponsor is the A-Rank adventurer, [White Winged Goddess]. Saying such thoughtless remarks, she might just decide that the Rich family is a very pesky thing?”

Startled, he stopped movement for a moment.

“… I-is that true? [White Winged Goddess], backing an inn like this?”
“Yeah, she often comes to stay. It’s not a lie, you can go hear it from the guild if you want. They won’t hide it, you’ll learn about it pretty fast… so, you get how bad it’d be to make trouble? Would that Rich family protect you if you made enemies with an A-Rank adventurer?”

The color of blood drained from his face. The power of an A-Rank adventurer’s title is crazy…

“I-I wish to express my thanks for the information…”

He coughed before continuing.

“I-I just remembered that I have some business elsewhere, I must be going.”

Thus, he promptly withdrew.

“You did good.”
“Should’a helped sooner!”
“Aren’t you embarrassed by relying on~ the~ goddess~?”

While the guests called out with a few teases, I returned to my seat while patting Meat’s head.

“Goshujin-sama, thank you.”
“What, that’s my duty from the start… It’d be good if they behaved themselves now…”
“Hyah—, y-yes… that’s right.”

While I played with Meat’s doggy ears with my fingers, for some reason I had a hunch that it probably wouldn’t work out like that.




… Well.
Really, even though it would’ve been good if they behaved themselves, that self-proclaimed knight commander just shut himself up in his room and his subordinates are doing whatever they please.

Particularly when they enter the bath, they don’t use [Cleanup], they swim around, they make a ton of noise and annoy everyone near them, and when they get out of the bath they leave food scattered about the floor in the lounge.
Even in the game room, they beat against the slot machine and tried to steal the playing cards. Come on.
When it comes to the entertainment business, just that much is just barely tolerable.

What I won’t tolerate is them trying to take my beds without permission.
Something huge like that would definitely get exposed.
However, that would’ve required them to think a little.

They tried to slice the beds in half and divide the work and take them home.

Ichika noticed it when she was casually going down the hallway and sweeping, she stopped them just before they cut them… those guys, even without their self-proclaimed knight commander they tried twisting our arms by saying, “We are the Rich family’s third elite guardsmen knight order!”
The self-proclaimed knight commander stopped them with a pale face though, yep. It’s already no use. They’ve crossed the line that I can’t forgive.

They tried to cut my beds into pieces and steal them. There’s no way I could forgive that, right?

And so, I decided to welcome them into my dungeon.



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