Negotiations with the Red Dragon

 

“So, what could be dissatisfying Oku-sama? I thought that I’d apologized enough with the [Dogene]?”
“O-Oku-sama… ehehe… ah—, that’s not it! Is that [Dogene] thing seriously an apology!?”

Oh, straight to point huh. Her head might not be so bad.

“Going to the point of lowering one’s entire body and not just their head, there is no higher form of apology. Oppositely, what posture does Oku-sama take as a form of apology?”
“Mu—… umuu, now that you say it, that’s right… this one lies down and shows her belly… or something!?”
“I see. So isn’t the [Dogene] much the same?”
“Huh!? How!?”
“It is the same posture. However, for you to still not believe my apology is sincere despite me going this far… I am saddened.”
“N-no, it’s not that this one doesn’t believe you—”

I wonder if hanging my head and looking at my hands was a bit much…? I decided to show her some charades, but that red dragon reacted like she did something bad to me. As expected of Stupimander’s Oku-sama huh.

“Is that sooo, so if you really believe me… in truth, I dug this tunnel so that we could pass through the mountain from our side, is there any way we could work something out?”
“… Not possible!”
“Oh… Oku-sama, so in other words you don’t believe me…”
“No! That’s not it! Mmm, Tsuia Mountain is mostly this one’s dungeon to begin with! You can’t open a path through it!”

The red dragon looked flustered when she refused. Hey, wait a second, what did she just say?

“What do you mean by Tsuia Mountain being mostly your dungeon?”
“The mountain. It’s all this one’s dungeon!”

By that, I guess she means all of it is the [Flame Cavern]?
I can’t picture it too well so let’s make a model. Taking out some leftovers from when I made the clay golems, I formed it into the rough shape of Tsuia Mountain while referring to the map.

“Oh? That’s Tsuia Mountain! You’re good with your hands!”
“Thanks. Let’s see, so if this is Tsuia Mountain, how much is the [Flame Cavern]?”
“About this much!”

About eighty percent of what the clay represented. Half of a little less than the twenty percent remaining was the size of our dungeon right now. It really is just the edge of Tsuia Mountain.
… [Flame Cavern] is pretty huge…. It would’ve been hard to dig a tunnel without knocking into it.

“Or rather, how long have you been making a dungeon in our mountain!?”
“Oooh, that’s a question for our dungeon core… Rokuko, how long~?”
[Eh? … … I don’t know exactly, but I think it’s somewhere around ten years?]

She replied back. Ten years huh~…

“Since around ten years ago.”
“We’ve been here for around five hundred years! We were here first!”
“Well, that’s why she’s No. 695… ah? Now that I think about it, No. 695… wasn’t that one a human type?”

Ontentoo was thinking about something that seemed trivial… Setting Stupimander aside, let’s try some negotiations.
Oh fellow master of negotiations… show me your skills!

“There’s no way I could pass a tunnel through?”
“No, it looks like you extended the cave this far by chance, but any farther is impossible! This one won’t let a single rat pass through her dungeon!”
“Could you part with just a little so that I could build the tunnel? I’d be fine paying in DP.”
“Ou, 500,000 DP for it then! That much because there are things to move if you extended this cave straight ahead!”

500,000 DP… well, I don’t think it’d cost that much to move things around. Also, overwriting territory, wouldn’t that have to be payed for as well? In other words, she’s overcharging me?
So brazen despite being Stupiwife!

“Even so, I can’t hand over 500,000 DP.”
“That so? Though it’s coming from this one, it’s a pretty great price!”

Hmm, that might not be the market price for exchanging territory, but I don’t know. I probably wouldn’t learn even if I asked Rokuko, so it’s impossible to say if paying 500,000 DP for it is actually an unreasonable amount of DP.
Although I want to drive down the price, this red dragon seems like an honest person. It might actually be a reasonable offer.
… Oh, come to think of it I just got a few gold coins huh?

“Would fifty gold coins work?”
“What use are gold coins? You’re stupid huh, it can’t be used if it’s not DP!”

The red dragon refused with a smile.
So it’s no good huh. It would’ve been great if I could pay in gold.
… No, wait a second. Dragons should love shiny things, let’s try actually showing it off.

I took out a single shining gold coin and held it in my right hand to show it off to the red dragon.

“Hahaha, 10,000 DP for a single gold coin… such a was—… O-oooh it’s this awesome!?”

Hook, line and sinker~~~! When I slowly moved my hand back and forth, the red dragon followed it with her eyes. She looked to the right when I moved right and to the left when I moved left. She’s completely captivated by it.
Ah, still though. My opponent’s still not sold on it huh?
I took out a silver coin and polished it till it shined and held it in my left hand.

“I’ll give one silver coin for every ten gold coins if you sell now.”
“Wha—! T-that’s, heeeh, really!?”
“Really! I would never lie!”

Moving the silver coin in my left hand in a circle while I said that, the red dragon’s whole face followed it.
Alright… time for one last push.

“B-but, hmmm…?”
“Oh, Oku-sama, are you still not satisfied? … That’s fine, then as a one day special, today only, I will add this service! Today! Right here! Only if you agree to accept the fifty gold coins as 500,000 DP! In addition to the extra silver coins, you will receive as a present… this crystal knight figurine!”
“Uoooh!?”

The moment I put the transparent and shining crystal knight figurine on the table, the red dragon’s eyes opened wide. [1]
The crystal knight figurine was twenty centimeters tall. I made it with mana potion bottles.

“T-this is… it’s like it could move at any moment…! Wonderful!”

It really could move if I wanted it to. It’s a golem after all. It sparkles and reflects a ridiculous amount of light since it was something made for a dragon’s interests. The red dragon’s eyes were sparkling so much that they wouldn’t lose to it though.

“This offer only stands only if you give an agreeable response right now.”
“A-alright! Isn’t it great 112!?

As though she were a child pleading for a shiny toy, she clapped her hands against Ontentoo, who was thinking about something in a daze.

“Aah? … Wait, right now, feels like I forgot something serious.”
“Muuu, hurry up! This one can’t get that figurine if we don’t answer right now!”
“Aaah, can’t be helped huh…. Ah. I remembered!!”

Ontentoo suddenly raised his voice to a roar.

“No. 695 is that No. 89 the [Betrayer]’s comrade isn’t sheeeee!!!”

Roar! Fire expelled from his mouth.
… Haku-san, this dungeon core is calling you a [Betrayer]. Well, you do hunt other dungeon cores I guess.

 

 

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Footnotes:
  • To be sure, the table referenced is figurative. He’s referring to [The Offer]. Return

50 thoughts on “Lazy Dungeon Master — Chapter 65

  1. Thank u always for ur great work…
    ^^…

    A little bit and the deal will be made, but that Stupimander remember that point…
    XD…

    still not believe believe my
    still not believe my ???

  2. Its reasonable to think Haku as Betrayer, but she is the most successfull one. To become boss of your enemy. How you will top that ?

    1. actually I think it was a success to me. I mean how many days did he just swindle out of them in order to prepare defenses

    1. Ahahaha I just got that LMFAO. That’s so du- wait I was that kid…. and I was pretty stupid BWAGAHAHHAHA!

  3. Thanks 4 the chapter!

    Reminds me of infomercials.
    Buy one now and get this lovely crystal figurine for FREE!

  4. 10 years?! So Rokuko had just that dinky one-room dungeon for 10 years straight? Ugh, just what was she wasting her DP on that whole time…

  5. >shining crystal knight figuring

    figurine

    I guess this’ll become a dungeon battle? Will Keima make a bunch of ‘crystal knight golem’ and make 112 hear his wife cries for every single one he breaks?

    Such mental attack should totally work.

    Alternatively he make alliance with them, getting his hotel another 2 near permanent customers…(I can imagine the two enjoying hotspring a lot)

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